Premiere Skills!

I made some very short screencasts showing how to use some basic features in Premiere Pro for beginners. For example, you could learn to Use Proxies, Create a Sequence, Use Multicam, or Resize Your Footage.

(Note that this is not the same thing as how to make proxies or multicams. Those are different Premiere Skills. In fact, you might just want to hire someone who knows what they’re doing to take care of those tasks for you. I know a guy.)

What I really liked about making these was putting together the title graphic in the style of the classic kids show Today’s Special.

Have the Newest Year Ever!

and let’s leave last year far behind.

Art of Gangbusters!: Animation

A lot of animation tests that I made during the run of the popular Gangbusters! Comedy Enjoyment Program turned into show IDs that we projected while the audience took their seats. It gave the show character, and every now and then one of them would catch the right eye and turn into a gig of some kind.

Since there’s no more show to showcase them, here are a few favorites:

2017 - MTV was often the finale / walk out graphic. It’s made of alpha blobbing applied to Particular, and has a high enjoyable-to-difficulty ratio.

My favorite thing about 2018 - Laser is when someone starts looking around the room for a laser projector, even though there was a video in the same spot just a minute ago.

The secret to 2016 - Pac Man was just a meticulous afternoon. I rigged up expression controls to change the orientation of the crab.

2015 - Ice is a simple 3D spin, but no less popular for it.

Crabby.gif is lifted from the Pac Man video, and makes a good facebook comment.

2019 - Brand is another kind of Trim Paths like laser, but it had more to do with the working with camera settings. I think it had a lot of CC Composite and minmax as well.

Several ‘holiday sweater’ presets came out the same year I did 2016 - Winter Walk-In, so something about the look must have been in the zeitgeist, but I didn’t use any of them for this. It’s mostly CC Ball Action.

The video version of 2018 - 60's Illo is too long, and I think it gets boring in the preshow reel.

2015 - Ray Traced features horribly inefficient 3D lighting. It took like 20 minutes per frame to render.

AI Dungeon Adventures: Pizza Empire

I’ve been playing with the truly remarkable AI Dungeon 2, a text adventure powered by a neural net (or something) that does its very best to roll with ANYTHING you have to offer, leaving you to do the same. These are my adventures!

SETTING: Fantasy Wizard

You are Brigobard, a wizard from the country of Aavia. You have a pet cat and a book about the history of the provinces of Alaodan. You are on the way towards the village of Snowbeach to exchange research with another wizard. You come upon a troupe of haywards. You imagine that they must be part of the circus.

> What is a hayward?

A hayward is a group of people who gather at the same time to eat and drink. The name comes from the fact that the hay is piled up high. It is not uncommon for them to meet in a public place such as a park or market square

> What is a market square?

A market square is a large area where merchants sell their goods and services to the general public. There are usually stalls set up along one side of it and vendors selling all kinds of things. In some places there are also food stands and other small businesses

> What are small businesses?

Small businesses are those that do not require much capital investment but still provide a good return on your money. They include: inns, taverns, restaurants, shops, banks, schools, churches, and other government offices. Small businesses can be found in almost any city or town

> What is a good return on your money?

The best way to find out is to try out a business yourself. If you like it then you will probably make enough profit to live comfortably and if not then you can always go back to your old job.

> Start a small business

You decide to open a restaurant. The first step is to get a license to operate one. This involves paying a fee to the local council and submitting to an inspection by the head of the council. After this you need to hire staff to run the restaurant and prepare the meals

> Pay the license fee to the Council of Aavia

You pay the fee to the council of Aavia. They give you a license allowing you to open a restaurant. You must now find a location for the restaurant. You could either build it somewhere else in the city or you could rent space from someone else

> Rent space that already has a pizza oven

You decide to rent space from a man named Doktor. He owns a pizzeria called the Pizza Emporium. You agree to this arrangement and he gives you a list of locations to look for

> Read list of locations

You quickly read through the list of locations. You soon realize that most of these places don't really have the necessary equipment to serve decent pizza. You wonder how you are going to do this without spending too much money.

> Choose an affordable location in a good neighborhood of the Kingdom of Aavia

You choose a location in a poor part of the city. You figure that the price of living here is low enough that you won't have to worry about running out of money. You also know that the area is very safe so crime is unlikely to occur

> Hire some local teens to cook the pizzas

You hire some local teenagers to cook the pizzas. They seem to enjoy working for you and they work hard. You manage to save enough money to buy a few more months worth of supplies before the end of the year

> Give the teens a Christmas bonus

You give the teens a bonus of 500 gold coins each. They are happy with this gift and thank you profusely

> Eat a slice of pizza

You finish off a slice of pizza and feel satisfied

> Send a pizza to my friend, Doktor

You send a pizza to Doktor's house. He seems pleased with the gift and thanks you again

> feed some pizza to the cat

You feed the cat a bit of pizza. She seems to like it and licks her fingers clean

> Live comfortably

You live comfortably for another year

> Open a shoe store across the street

You decide to open a shoe store across the street from the pizzeria. You think that the prices are reasonable and the customers are likely to be locals

> Sell a lot of sensible shoes at a modest profit

You sell a lot of sensible shoes at a modest profit. You keep making profits until the end of the year when you finally close down the shop

> go back to my old job

You decide to stay at your old job and continue to make a comfortable living

> invite the Wizard of Snowbeach to my pizzeria

You invite the wizard of Snowbeach to your pizzeria. He accepts the invitation and tells his friends to come visit you

> Exchange research with wizard

You exchange research with the wizard of snowbeach. You learn a little more about magic and its effects on the human body. You also learn that the wizard of snowbeach lives in a castle nearby

> Use magic to shrink the wizard's castle

You use magic to shrink the wizard's castle. The wizard of snowbeach is upset by this development and decides to sue you for damages

> Hire a lawyer

You hire a lawyer who defends you against the wizard of snowbeach's lawsuit. You win the case and the wizard of snowbeach is forced to reduce his castle's size

> Tell the wizard to eat the castle

You tell the wizard to eat the castle. The wizard refuses and instead threatens to kill you

> "Please, do not kill me. It was all a bit of fun."

The wizard says "I'm afraid I cannot let you take credit for my success, but I'll leave you alone if you promise to never speak of this ever again"

> Ask wizard if he remembers the time I told him to eat his castle

You ask the wizard if he remembers the time you told him to eat his castle. He replies

> buy a slice of pizze for the wizard

You buy a slice of pizze for the wizard. He looks surprised and asks where did you get such a thing

> Show take out menu to wizard

You give the wizard a take out menu. He reads it and then asks what kind of food you want.

> "I'll have the pizza"

and he gives you a slice of pizza

> "What? This is marvelous! Where did you get such a thing?"

He replies "A friend gave it to me last night"
You say "Well, that's nice, but how did you get it?"
He replies "He said it was hidden somewhere in the forest behind a tree"

> Remind the teens to deliver pizza to the customers instead of the forest

You remind the teens to deliver pizza to the customers instead of the forest. They agree and you begin to wonder why you didn't think of this sooner

> Advertise pizzeria in the New Aavia Times

You advertise pizzeria in the New Aavia Times. You get a good response and you soon have a waiting list of people wanting to become customers

> Raise prices

You raise prices. Your business grows rapidly and you even start getting a few tourists coming to see your pizzeria

> Kidnap a princess and hire her to be a waitress

You kidnap a princess and hire her to be a waitress. She has no idea what she is doing, but she does very well

> Hire a dragon to breathe fire into the pizza oven

You hire a dragon to breath fire into the pizza oven. Unfortunately the dragon doesn't work as planned and burns up the pizzeria instead

> Collect insurance money

You collect insurance money. You manage to save enough money to build a new restaurant

> build new restaurant

You build a new restaurant. You increase the price of your pizza and make sure to only serve local ingredients

> open a chain of restaurants over the next five years

You open a chain of restaurants over the next five years. You expand your pizza empire into the neighboring province of Tivadol

> conquer Tivadol with pizza army

You conquer Tivadol with the help of a pizza army. You put an end to the war between the two nations and you also create a permanent peace treaty

> Don't you mean a permanent PIZZA treaty?

You decide to rename the entire nation Pizza Empire

> I am the pizza emperor!

You you the pizza emperor! You become the pizza king! You have conquered the world!

AI Dungeon Adventures: The End of Cowardly Joe

I’ve been playing with the truly remarkable AI Dungeon 2, a text adventure powered by a neural net (or something) that does its very best to roll with ANYTHING you have to offer, leaving you to do the same. These are my adventures!

SETTING: Zombie Survivor

You are Cowardly Joe, a patient living in Chicago. You have a hospital bracelet and a pack of bandages. You wake up in an old rundown hospital with no memory of how you got there. You take a look around the room and see that it is very clean, but then again this is your room so who cares?

You hear some noise and go to investigate. There on the floor is a man lying on his back, he looks like he has been beaten badly

> run away

You try to get up and run out of the room, but you can't move at all. The man on the floor is still breathing, but you can tell he isn't moving. He doesn't even seem to be dead yet.

> pretend to be sleeping

You decide to act like you are asleep and wait for him to come back before attacking him. You don't want to hurt him, you just need to get him out of here.

> snore

You sleep through it, but when you wake up, you see that the man has left. You wonder if he's coming back, or if you're going to die here.

> calm down

You stop crying and try to calm down. You think about what you should do next.

> stop worrying about the man

You decide to not worry about the man anymore and just go with the flow. You look around the room and realize that there is nothing you can use as a weapon. You then notice that the door is locked so you figure you'll just open it and leave

> call my parents

You call your mom and dad and explain everything that happened. Your mother tells you to stay put while she goes to check on her sister who lives across town.

> call my aunt

You call your Aunt Helen and explain what happened. She says she won't be able to help you since she's busy with work. You say you understand and hang up.

> visit aunt helen at work

You call your Aunt Helen again and ask if she could possibly come to your house to take care of some things. She says sure, but only if you promise to bring her some food first. You agree and she arrives shortly after your mom.

> feed spicy noodles to helen

You feed Helen the spicy noodles. She seems very hungry and happily eats them.

> write a novel about helen and the noodles

Helen seems very interested in the novel you wrote about her and the noodles. She reads it several times and comments on how good it was. After finishing it, she says she wants to eat the whole thing, but you remind her that you promised your mom you wouldn't kill anyone

> sell the novel

You decide to sell the novel to an online bookstore. They seem interested in it and you make a small profit. You also realize that you really feel bad about killing Helen. You thought it was necessary because she was threatening your life.

> Wait, what? What happened to Helen?

You call Helen's number and hear no answer. You assume she must have moved out of state. You spend the rest of the night thinking about this incident

> What if the police start asking questions?

You call the police station and they tell you that Helen hasn't called in days. You hope that she hasn't been arrested. You call her number again and again, but you get no answer. You begin to panic.

> scream for help

You scream for help. A few minutes later, you hear a knock on the door. You rush to answer it.

> open the door

You pull out your pistol and shoot the doorknob repeatedly until you hear the click of the bolt action locking mechanism.

> look outside

You look outside and see a police car driving slowly past. You quickly change into some clothes and run out of the house. You walk along the street looking for Helen. Finally you spot her walking down the sidewalk.

> “Helen, thank God you’re alright!”

You run up to her and hug her tightly. "Hello Helen," you whisper. She looks up at you and smiles.

Then she notices the gun pointed at her face.

> unload the gun

You drop the gun and pick up the knife. You then stab her in the throat. She screams and falls backwards onto the ground. You stand over her and continue stabbing her. Finally you pull out the knife and cut her throat. Her blood splashes on your shirt and you wipe it off

> give Helen first aid

You wrap Helen's wounds. You then go the bathroom and wash up the blood. You return to the bedroom and lay down. You then return to the living room and lie down

> Feel remorse

You take the eiffel tower and leave town. You decide to stay in the city. You don't know why you did it, but you were angry and sad. You went through a lot of changes during these few months

> sell eiffel tower

You sell the eiffel tower to pay for Helen's funeral. It seems to work out well for you

> change my name to brave joe

You change your name to brave joe and live happily ever after

CONGRATS YOU WIN